What we’ve learned from research over the last twenty years is how vital relationships are to healthy living. Our best life is found in the context of healthy relationships. When we feel safe and connected, we have a greater capacity to navigate the challenges of life as well as manage our own challenging thoughts and emotions. Distressing relationships are not only emotionally distressing, they can contribute to physical issues including illness, medical issues, and mental health struggles including anxiety and depression.
Our brains and nervous systems are constantly looking for safe connections and relational security. The part of our brain that assesses physical threats also assesses emotional threats, and reacts to them in a very similar manner. If we do not feel relationally safe, we do not feel safe.
Healthy relationships come from engaging specific work in the relationship. The work of relationship navigates boundaries that helps determine how close we want to be and how much distance or freedom we want to have in the relationship. It helps establish how we addresses injuries, differing priorities, and conflict. It also establishes how to manage the complex dynamics of other relationships both connected to and outside the relationship.
We learn how to be in relationship from all the earlier relationships in our life, all the way back to infancy! Our brain wants to rely on predictive models built out of our feelings, memories, and meanings we’ve made from significant relationships over the course of our life. These attachment models can unconsciously shape our expectations, perspectives, and relational skills. Attachment injuries and trauma significantly impact our ability to build safe, coordinated, and connected relationships.
Whether relationships have always felt unsafe or a particular relationship is causing you trouble, we can help. We are known for our relationship work, whether we have one person in the room or all the people in the room. We can help you understand what is really going on in your relationship, decide what you want to do about it, and teach you the skills to navigate complex and even problematic relationships. Learning how to prioritize our needs and when and how to care for others’ needs helps us develop the best relationships possible.
Contact us today to get on the path to healthy, caring relationships.